halloween in nyc = nye in vegas

i heard that halloween in new york was crazy. i heard about the parade and how it was impossible to get anywhere in the city. i didnt worry about it at all because i was headed to tavern on the green which is only 15 blocks from my house. lucky me! NOT. i should have listened to everyone and not thought i was invincible to the hell this city throws out at people.

8:30 pm - i leave the house to go to stuy town to meet connie (she has my cowboy hat and cowboy boots). i take the M11 bus down 9th ave and get off on 14th street. it seems pretty crowded in the area for me to take the crosstown bus so i decide to walk. first of all, it started raining and then at 7th ave it started to get crowded. by the time i hit the subway stop, i am stuck in shoulder to shoulder foot traffic. by the end of the block, i turn into a back grazing skank as i am so close to the people around me that as i push past from person to person my boobs graze everyone's back. as i try to walk closer to 6th ave i realize that the parade is on 6th ave so i try to turn around and it gets even more crowded! there was no way for me to turn a right and go south so i tried to turn around and back track. the way back was even worse and people kept pushing me to the point that i almost fell over. i was so close to people that i couldnt even breathe. at one point a large woman yelled at everyone to stop pushing or else i was going to get squished! bless her heart.

9:30 pm - is the time im finally able to get out of the crowd. i was so traumatized that i yelled to all the people walking towards 6th to turn around because theyll regret the experience. i then thought that it would be smart to walk around the parade. every street was basically blocked off by the parade UNTIL HOUSTON. keep in mind it was really coming down now and i was soaked and i made the decision to try the subway. luckily the station gave me access to the red line or to the L. i tried to get to the L but it was so crowded that i just got on the 1 train and went straight back home. i was drenched and had to change the shirt from my costume and was so stressed that i had a glass of jack on the rocks. (yes, pregamed alone)

11:30 pm - i finally head to tavern on the green. this place is FULL of people in some pretty awesome costumes. only problem was that all those people were headed to the tavern. ok well no that wasn't the only problem. the first was that we couldnt find the rest of our friends for the longest time. the second problem was that there were SO many people trying to get into the party. the third and worse was that new yorkers are new yorkers. let me elaborate....the party ended up getting shut down because a few over eager and impatient partygo-ers decided to whack the tent entrance and tear it because the party doors wouldnt open.

ok thats enough because the night just ended up getting bad and worse then finally at 4 am it got better.